I had cottage cheese for the first time last night.

That cheese shouldn't even exist and I have no idea how people eat it as diet food. I was in the dairy section picking up some sour cream and saw the stacks of cute little containers of Breakstone's cottage cheese and peach topping. Feeling adventurous, I tossed one in the cart. I tried it when I got home, and it didn't help that there's about 1/4 as much peach topping as one would need to choke down the cheese. Are you sure it's legal to call that cheese? Little rubbery lumps swimming in sour milk juice. How could anything so similar to the Indian dessert Ras Malai be so awful?

I'm adding cottage cheese to Ethiopian food on my "Do Not Try Again" list. This just asserts that cheese is the anti-Asian food.

The girl who isn't afraid of eating 1000 year old duck eggs is afraid of cheese.

Right now, I want some key lime truffles!